Chronicle, War Horse, underworld awakening commentary, & Bis Aufs Blut a.k.a. stronger than blood ; with a tangent or two…of course

chronicle

…ahh what can be said of this here movie….well….there’s a cool middle act….horribly stupid ending segment…and really feels like a portion of a bigger story….however I don’t see any sequels coming as it only achieved moderate success at the box office if I remember correctly….I say that based on..cloverfield is how old now and the sequel that was supposed to happen ain’t happened yet? Same formula of the handheld found footage style….there’s not a whole ton to like here. The characters are mostly annoying and under developed…the story is a mess…and some of the abilities the characters gain play off just a bit to cheesey….in any case I guess there’s bigger wastes of time than this but i don’t recommend you go out of your way to see it;;; Also I REALLY wanted to like it…but I think I knew I wouldn’t love it….and I think I can’t really say I DID like it….as per what I’ve already said…or implied….there’s not a whole lot to love here ((well i said like…same diff..lol))….so the trend of movies that clock in around 80 minutes being terrible..does continue…and yet…I just now said it’s terrible but still am giving it a 3.35…way to contradict myself eh? Maybe because it was set in seattle I’m giving it .35 more love than it deserves? It’s a solid very average 3…which on a scale of 1-5….is really only 60%..so it’s really not even a c…it’s more like a c minus or d….thus having nothing to do with THIS movie but I came to 3.5 as a solid rating for something that is average…and yet that’s not half of 5…go figure right?…..

Long of the short…don’t waste your time unless you really want to see this…maybe if you’ve got movie channels and it’s on and you got nothing better to do..go ahead and watch it..but your life CAN be complete without ever seeing this.

((((also note the irony in my near suggestion I’d like to see a sequel or two…and yet I don’t love this…per as I said..feels like though it’s not a great movie I do care about the how and why….which could never live up to anything nearly as interesting as I could make up in my own head I don’t think)))))  (((((also there’s things in the scenes around the space needle that don’t exist in seattle…so obviously was filmed in vancouver..or a soundstage..I love when they put shit into a movie that doesn’t exist in seattle…..really i do….see the ending of mission impossible ghost protocol for a completely NON existent location on the water…with a non existent, in seattle anyway..it exists in vancouver where it was shot, surrounding area))))

((((there’s an extra feature on the dvd featuring other people playing either the same characters…or a group of different characters that share the same name…one of them which is a white dude with a fro who seems to be the black dude in the actual movie…I find that odd…could be just me)))))

War Horse
146 minutes but feels a bit more like 100 (not that the measure of a movie or film is in minutes..oh wait…it kind of is..haha…i digress) When I first saw advertising for this movie my thought was why in the hell would I want to watch that. I think eventually some other stuff I saw changed me to the side of I need to watch it..but i probably am not going to love it. Well……Beautifully shot, but of course anyone who knows anything can see that much from trailers, great in the sense of how well it goes with the film (and this really IS a film more than a mere movie) music or soundtrack. Almost not that much of a story BUT it will pull you in…unless you hate horses…but even if you DO hate horses…maybe just MAYBE if you hate animals you will find nothing to keep your attention here. It does drag at one point…or at least I felt the opening act was amazing….the second bit was quite good..and than it took a detour for the less than stellar. It’s because of that detour I went from thinking five stars…five stars…five stars….to hmm…four stars?….Although the slow bit or the bit that kind of pulls you out of the narrative for a bit does serve its purpose…however perhaps ten minutes or so could have been trimmed and it would have hit that five star mark of perfection? I don’t really know because at the same time maybe another twenty minutes would have done the same thing? Anywho great effing movie…and I was watching it on a pretty small tv screen but the visuals and the sound still popped…REALLY surprised at how well the music came through in the opening segment….I can just imagine how amazing it must have looked on say an imax screen with the whatever point o version of surround sound that now exists and they have. That being said..I think I’d like to one day, somehow, see this on an imax screen. Perhaps it will get a rerelease for it’s tenth anniversary or something? Perhaps it will just fall to the wayside and be another movie that most people forget…however…I think this COULD be the high mark for a great piece of art on film that steven spielberg wanted to accomplish and it just might cement his career as a filmmaker for ages to come. I could also be overselling it and it may just not be all that great…but again I point you towards…I initially had nearly ZERO interest in even seeing this movie…and now I’m singing the praises of how bloody well awesome it is. If you’re a naysayer such as I was..you really should give it a try. If you hate it…well I don’t see you watching all of it if it doesn’t grab you early and quickly…but if for some reason you’re reading this and you take my advice and you watch all of it and you hate it….My apologies…..but you obviously aren’t a fan of art in film.   4-4.5 *’s     
      Further more I must add, per a tweet I sent out but as I already alluded to in the above. Unless Spielberg has another epic to pull out of his ass..and it’s about ten times as epic as Empire of the Sun was, and still is, I don’t see him topping this in his legacy. However a lot actually CAN still be said about how amazing empire of the sun remains…BUT I think war horse may just connect to a larger audience over time and will be seen by more people over time than empire of the sun ever will. Just the nature of the beast as it were. From a critical or personal or combination there of standpoint however….I think Empire of the Sun might just be the better movie…but it could be quite close between the two. (((I’ve definitely seen Empire of the Sun more times than I have War Horse as of this typing…I think that will probably remain true in the future as well…but one could argue if I’ve seen Empire of the Sun 50 times and ten years from now I will seen it say 55 times to 25 viewings of War Horse…factor in inflation due to time…and it could be given to the latter for more viewings HOWEVER and still I don’t see that ever being the case…I also don’t think I’ve seen/watched Empire of the SUn 50 times..but it’s probably at 20…on a total side note…I’ve always wished i kept track of how many times i’ve watched movies…I tried for a short while but it was really a hassle…much more so than how many times I’ve seen a band..because sometimes with a movie I might catch the ass end of it…or may only somehow see half of it…and that just shoots the count all to shit….still I would like to be able to confidently say and truthfully say I’ve seen such and such 37 times…..there are definitely a few movies I’m sure I’ve watched well over 100 times…but not beyond a shadow of a doubt could i say FOR SURE I’ve seen it that many times…who cares at the end of the day right? Just saying though…..would love to say things with certainty….applies also to amusement parks or the rides…I did ride one roller coaster at silverwood 50 or 53 times i think it was in one day…not as difficult as you might think as the ride was only about a minute long….and way back in the day at universal studios I rose the back to the future ride probably 30 times..maybe more like 20…but definitely a shit ton of times. End tangent 🙂 )))

Underworld Awakening Commentary
 4-4.5*’s You’re either a commentary person or you’re not..IF you are..this one is well worth listening to. Highlights include “that’s a waste of good heroin” and the word “brutal” being uttered quite a bit. As of my typing this right now I can’t remember to many specifics but I THINK it’s a commentary that manages to both entertain and inform…and go off the rails perhaps quite a bit too (or maybe not…I can’t fully remember but it was at least quite entertaining). (off the rail commentaries are quite rare these days with all the lawyers telling them what they can and can’t say…)

Bis Aufs Blut a.k.a. stronger than blood  a.k.a. FuckUps   aka “masterplan”  3.5*’s? some weird edits..some of the captioning for the dialouge flys by to fast and the story kind of goes all over the place too…also the fate of a character or two isn’t touched upon and that’s no fun…It’s in german but one of the characters seems to be a bilingual american as he speaks in english sometimes. Kind of felt like I was watching a bunch of wannabe eminems in germany but there’s a bit more depth and hear to the story despite my saying it’s all over the place. I can’t recommend or NOT recommend it…it’s one of those things that if you’re into more than what hollywood has to offer you will likely find…it’s a decent enough flick thus my self questioning 3.5 stars. ((also the last two aka’s …just because both things are said so many freaking times in the movie….FuckUps really does sum it all up quite well actually))

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About jahwoo

I am the shiznit...need more be said? If you think so..than you probably don't need to be here :-D
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